I'm feeling a little clumsy!

Alright, well I just spent about an hour creating a blog post and I posted it to the WRONG blog! I don't know if a year of fatigue is just catching up with me but lately I've been a little clumsy with my driving and just a little out of sorts. Wierd.

Anyways, if you want to read the blog follow this link: www.starsmithphotography.blogspot.com.

Merry Christmas everyone!

Sawyer stabbed me with a steak knife...

I'm not kidding.

Updates to follow soon.

P.S. no one got hurt... :)

Oh, Memories...

So many of our friends are having their first babies (or have just recently had their first baby) and it brings me back to that time in my life. There is nothing like a first baby. It is such an exciting time of life. Everything is uncertain and frenzied. Your body is changing, your relationships are changing. YOU are changing. It is amazing how much one little baby can change a person so much!

Man, oh, man. Sometimes I wish I could go back to that experience and just revel in it. If I could travel back in time and tell myself something I would say:

1) Relax! You're doing great. Everyone is clothed and fed and mildly well rested.

2) Don't rush everything. Baby J will crawl (or roll over or walk) when she's ready. Enjoy her chubby little body while it she sits still on your lap.

3) It's okay if your baby cries a little. It's hard; I know, but trust me, it really does hurt you more than her.

4) Don't complain about tempter tantrums or projectile reflux. Some day (too soon) you'll be clean and rested. Your child will use the potty and feed herself. It goes by too fast so just revel in it now.

I have loved every single moment of being a mother. I can't believe how blessed I am. I can't believe how lucky I am to have a wonderful husband and two cute babies! It is all going by so fast. I wish I could slow it all down and drink it in. I wish I could record the feelings that I have every time my kids give me hugs and kisses. Everytime Sawyer starts laughing big belly laughs for no reason at all. Every time Jane tells me I'm her "favorite girl". It's not going to last. It will all be over way too soon.

New mom's please don't take this time in your life for granted. Your life will never be the same and (most likely) you'll love every minute of it (in retrospect, but only sometimes).

Anyone?

Is anyone out there?

I know I'm not consistent about blogging but is anyone out there? I'll be better. I'll blog once a week. I need adoring comments and updates from my friends! If no one responds to this... I'll keep blogging but I won't enjoy it as much.

ARE YOU OUT THERE??

Check it out...

So, I took a leap and started my own photography website. I've got a lot to learn but I'm proud of what I've created so far.

Check it out!

www.starsmithphotography.blogspot.com

It was a party!

Sawyer turned ONE on Sunday October 25th, 2009! We had a great little party with the Tallahassee family. As you can see Sawyer had a rockin Batman cake (Jake picked it out).

Jane got her own special cake too. That Manga sure knows how to make a big sister feel special!

We had a hard time blowing out the candle. There was only one candle and I couldn't blow it out!

Sawyer was just getting started. Since he didn't have his own cake, we gave him 1/4 of the Batman cake!

It tastes good...

Sawyer sharing with mom. He's nice like that.

After all of that cake he needed a drink of milk, of course...

and a bath,

Sawyer was so good at opening presents! He got the hang of it on his first try.

I thought I uploaded the picture with all four of us in it...rats. Well, Jake was present at Sawyers party. We all had a great time!

Here's to hoping that Sawyer's second year is as wonderful, fun and memorable as the first. I can't believe that my sweet little boy is a toddler!

(Almost) Happy Birthday Sawyer!

So, my sweet baby boy is almost one year old!

I can't believe it...

I think time moves faster with each child that you have.

Anyways, I just wanted to post some of the wonderfully cute things that he is doing lately.

So, here is the list:

1) Sawyer has started saying "night, night" when he is tired. It is really the only thing he can tell me but he makes sure I know!

2) Sawyer is waving at people. He is so cute!

3) He has started dancing to music and

4) he thinks it is so funny when Jane shakes her hair around like a crazy girl and falls on the ground. They have started doing things to make each other laugh. It is so cute!

5) Sawyer has mastered the art of walking BACKWARDS! It is so cute and he is so proud of himself when he does it. My favorite is when he walks backwards, into my lap, on purpose!

6) Sawyers favorite thing to do while dancing is spin around. He leads with his hands (they cross across his body) and follows from there. He loves to spin. It is basically his main form of dancing but he also shakes his hands and wiggles his rear. I'm trying to get a good video of it with my camera phone but everytime I turn the phone on he stops to check out the camera.

Anyways, I'm so in love with this little boy (and Jake and Jane). We are so lucky to have such a wonderful boy in our family!

Happy Birthday Jane Portraits

Here are a few of the shots that I took of Jane at the beach. She didn't want to do a photo shoot; she wanted to ride the waves! Plus, she's having a problem producing sweet smiles on demand (see 2nd day of school post below). I think she is beautiful. I can't believe that she is THREE YEARS OLD!! Where the heck does time go?

Sweet Bedtime

Tonight at bedtime Jane was trying every trick in her book to stay up later. Finally as I inched towards the door she says to me:
"Mom, did you know Monkey's swing?"
"Yes, Jane, I did", I replied.
"Did you know that sometimes animals stomp?" she says.
"Yea! sometimes they do!" I say.
"Did you know that birds flap their wings?" she says while flapping her arms.
"Yea, I did. You're right" I said.

With that I blew her a kiss, said I love you and closed the door. I love the sweet taste of motherhood. Seeing the world through my children's' eye's for the very first time is wonderful.

2nd Day of School

Here are some pictures from sweet baby Jane's second day of pre-school. We didn't get our camera in time to get first day of school pictures.

Sweet Baby Jane: so excited to go to school. She's got cute clothes, her hair has been done and she of course has her back pack!
She can hardly contain her enthusiam.

In fact, we're all so excited we can't stop smiling!

I asked for a "sweet smile" and this was all she could produce. We're working on it...

Once Jane gets to school she has to open her window so everyone knows who is at school for the day. Here is Jane opening her window!

I found out later that Jane actually used the potty at school this day. I was so proud! If I could only get her to actually use the potty at home as well!

It's my life!

Well, folks, I'm back. It's been a while I know but I felt less than motivated to post without pictures. As you can see I have a NEW camera and lots of shiny new pictures to print. (Halleluja!) Sawyer is feeling a little under the weather so we weren't surprised when he fell asleep in the car. He's hardly sleeping right now because his little nose stops up anytime he is laying down.

Look at my sweet baby Jane.

Jane at her finest.

My first attempt at creative photography...I've got a lot of work and studying to do!

My favorite part of the day. Look at that handsome smile and those strong hands (rubbing my feet, no less).

Jake makes the funniest faces while talking on the phone.

Example 1. (He won't let me post the other examples)

Be sure to look out for a going to school post with pictures as well as just fun learning how to use our camera pictures.

Ciao!

Worst. Outing. EVER!!!!!!!!!

Oh my gosh. Today was a pretty crazy/bad day!
My kids are Hooligans which is pretty much to be expected considering who their parents are but AFTER a long day of negotiations with Jane and carting Sawyer around I finally made it out of the house to run my errands.
Before I could even leave I had to put air in one of our tires because it has a slow leak. While I was doing this Jake put a couple of bags of garbage on top of the car for me to throw out on my way out.
Well, I forgot about the garbage and pulled out into traffic, apparently, with garbage falling off of my car as I drove away. It's disgusting, I know and if I would have known about it I would have stopped right away and picked it up. No question!
So, this guy, who apparently saw me "throw" my garbage into the street follows me for about 2 miles and gets out of his car when I am stopped at a red light, bangs on my window and proceeds to yell at me about throwing my garbage out on the street.
I couldn't even speak. I was so scared when he banged on my window. I was minding my own business, listening to the radio and nearly peed in my pants when he pounded on the glass next to me.
It was no secret that I was scared and the guy yelled at me anyways! He waited until after I stopped freaking out before he yelled at me! Can you even believe it?!

So then, after I turned around to go pick up the garbage that some good Samaritan picked up for I went along on my errands and on the way home someone else yelled at me!

I was in the turn lane and had a green light so I started to turn. But there was a pedestrian crossing the road that was in my blind spot. Well, of course, as soon as I saw her I slammed on my breaks and said sorry. Do you know what that lady did? She stopped in the middle of the road, gave me a look like I'd infected her with the Bubonic Plague and yelled at me for almost hitting her! She didn't even have the walk signal for her to be in the crosswalk. If I would have hit her, she would have gotten a ticket. Not me!

Well, I was so stressed the whole rest of the drive home. I could hardly breath straight and think straight. It was crazy. I called Jake right away and told him that we will be leaving Gainesville as soon as we can. I don't want to live in a city with so many hateful people. Jake told me that it could just as easily have happened in Tallahassee or Orlando or Atlanta or anywhere. He is, of course, right but it hasn't happened in any of those other places...

I am like super stressed to the max today.

Have you ever?

Have you ever...

- Taken a shower with your little baby while his arms are wrapped around you and his head is laying on your shoulder? It is, seriously, the most peaceful and tender thing I've done all week.

- Embarrassed yourself by crying over something that doesn't really matter that much to you anyway?

- Realized how much you have grown and changed in the last year?

- Fought the urge to scream at your child because she bit you so hard you wanted to cry and won?

- Figured out what the parenting books are really talking about when they tell you to be kind and firm?

- Decided to just give someone the benefit of the doubt?

- Been really impressed with the man your brother has become?

- Been told by your husband that there is a big bug under your foot?

- Looked down and seen said bug writhing to get away with all the life left in it? (Ew, seriously)

- Felt really good about what you accomplished in a day?

Okay, so I know this list is pretty corny but my life has been pretty full lately. There have been victories and disappointments and all of the sweet and loving tenderness that comes from just being a mom and living life.

Compared to this time last year my life is so much easier. At the same time though it has so many challenges. One really smart person told me once that the Lord shows his love for us by giving us challenges. Of course I rolled my eyes at this with my college freshmen attitude. In the last few months (maybe years...) this thought has really stuck with me.

I am so grateful for the challenges that I have. I have learned so much about myself and what I am capable of; I have had a glimpse of what my potential is. I know that the Lord trusts me to endure through my trials and I know that if I can be faithful that my testimony will only be stronger because of them.

I also want my friends to know how grateful I am for them. You know who you are. We may not live next door to one another or be able to start the invitation only village that I would LOVE to start but I know I can count on you. I know that your thoughts and prayers are with me as mine are with you. You are the sisters I have longed for my whole life and I am so blessed to claim you as my friend.

Little Steps...

BIG NEWS!!

Sawyer took his first independent steps today!

We didn't even know he could stand independently.
Here's how it went down:
Jake got Sawyer up from a nap and put him down in front of me. I was helping Sawyer stand and just let go to see what would happen.
Well, Sawyer stood their for a second or two and then took one step forward before sitting down ever so gracefully (seriously, he sat down gracefully, no falling at all).
Sawyer proceeded to do this a couple of times in a row.

Have I mentioned yet that he is only 8.5 months old?! Crazy huh?
Jane was a relatively early walker herself.
And they do say that boys pick up physical skills more quickly... so I really shouldn't be surprised, Right?!

In other news, we've been trying a new method of punishment for all of Jane's hitting. Instead of spanking, lecturing or putting her in time-out we have been holding her down and giving her kisses for every hit she gives us. This totally de-escalates (is that a word?) for me. I feel less like screaming at the top of my lungs and more like laughing when we do this so even if it doesn't work for Jane, it is worth it because it keeps me calm.

The funny thing is that it actually works with Jane.
We started this yesterday and today she is taking considerably less swipes at us than she normally does. Yesterday the hitting and kissing game would last for 5 or more minutes at a time. We would literally be holding her down and kissing her arms and legs and face she was trying to hit and kick us so many times. Today she just tries to kick and run and gives up after about 10 tries when she sees that she's not fast enough to get away without a kiss yet.

If I think of any more brilliant parenting tricks I'll be sure to post them here first!

Sweetheart

Jane is growing bigger every day.
She'll be three in 18 days! (Can you believe it?!)

Today she came up to me, caressed my cheek and said:
"Sweetheart. Listen to me. I'll keep you safe from the alligators"

What a little cutie pooty.

Jake also cut Sawyer's hair while I was sleeping in the other day. He buzzed it all off!! I woke up to a son that I didn't even recognize. (Well, I DID recognize him but I couldn't believe all his hair was gone!)

Jake says Sawyer looks like a boy now instead of a girly boy. Hmph...

I'd love to show you guys a picture of Sawyer's new "manly" haircut but we lost our camera when we went to ATL for my brother's wedding.

Day-trippin it.

I just can't get enough of this little boy. He looks like THIS after I smear sunscreen all over his face.

These two don't have to try hard to wear the same face as this scary statue.

This little girl is just too cute. She's smiling in front of Sleeping Beauty's castle.

Family Picture. We don't get to take too many of these...

Little Jane Jane pushing Sawyer Joyer. She should get a medal for being a great big sister.

Sawyer. HOLLA!

So, here's a little update on sweet little Sawyer Joyer. I swear to you this kid is a natural born model (and swimmer...). If he is upset, all I have to do is pull out the camera and I see nothing but smiles. Check it out.

He kind of likes to chew on crayons... wierd huh?

Oh, my aching heart...

So, if any of you follow my facebook status then you've seen in the last couple of days that I haven't been having a good time with the kids.

Sitting here, after Mother's Day and the extra hour of sleep that I got on Saturday morning I need to say that my heart is aching for all kinds of reasons.

1. My kids are amazing and loving little animals that make me smile every day.

2. My kids are real big stinkers some days.

I am so grateful for my children and I wouldn't trade them for anything and at the same time I feel completely overwhelmed some days. Someone mentioned on my facebook status that I should be grateful for having kids when some people can not have any and I want to respond to that by saying that I am SO grateful for my children. Anyone who really knows me knows that I live, breathe, eat and sleep my children and I wouldn't trade them for anything. That being said, I'm allowed to feel overwhelmed and like I need help. All days are not supposed to be good days. Motherhood forces one to stretch and grow and bend and flex in unimaginable ways. It is because of the bending and stretching that I am able to grow as a mother and person. I know that the bad days lead to that one great day where I will be able to claim my family for eternity and I'll take them. There is no question about it. But I'm allowed to be overwhelmed and if I can't vocalize those feelings then I may not learn from the wisdom of a mother around me who has been through the same thing and come out on top.

I love my children. My family is the one great success that I have in life. I hear all the time about how I am selling myself short by not working. I hear sideways comments all the time about snooty housewives who don't know anything but the truth is that I am fulfilling my divine role as a mother and a wife and I wouldn't have it any other way.

It's RIDICULOUS!

"That's ridiculous, Mom" is Jane's favorite phrase du jour.
Here is a conversation that we had the other day.

Mom: Jane I'm going to braid your hair and you're going to look at it and say "ooooohhhh Thank You, Mom."

Jane: No. I won't.

Mom: You won't? Why not?

Jane. I won't. That's ridiculous.

If this girl weren't so much like myself I think I'd lose my mind. She is great. Life is moving along and, of course, she lets me braid her hair even though it is ridiculous.

Tagged

I've been so behind lately that I didn't realized I had been tagged until I started surfing blogs and reading "older posts".

Jennie tagged me so here's my pic.

This picture was taken before church when I was pregnant with Jane.

Flashback!

So, we're at the grandparents house and while snooping around on their computer I ran into all of these fun pictures. It is fitting also that we take a look back at the last few months because Saywer's six month birthday is THIS WEEKEND!! I can't believe how much my little family has grown in the last half a year. I love them so much.

Sawyer on the car ride home from the hospital.

Sawyer's blessing. This is the Tallahassee side of the family. None of my family was able to make it.

The new family of four. Such fun.

The grandparents first visit to Gainesville brought us to the Museum of Natural History which includes a rockin butterfly house. In this picture I think Jake and I are talking about how soon Sawyer would need to eat (new mom milk supply is crazy!).

Best friends. Sawyer is Jane's "Best Boy". I love my kids. They are such a wonderful blessing in my life.

Easter Pictures